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“It has to do with instant gratification,” said Anna Daines, a sophomore studying communication. “They don’t want to go through the work to try and get a real relationship, but it’s, ‘I want this now, so I’m going to go through this way to get it.'”
A concern that arises with these newer digital dating techniques is that they are often too focused on outward appearance. Apps like Tinder and dating websites like http://www.makaszka.pl/call-tracker-software-free-download-for-android Call tracker software free download for android beautifulpeople.com encourage teens and young adults to seek approval from their peers or the community based on their outward appearance.
Tanner Tait, a sophomore studying computer information technology, said people tend to use these resources to feel important or validated by other people.
“It’s a popularity contest, and you just brag about how many ‘swipes’ you get to the right,” Tait said.
These dating resources, rather than being used to meet new people, quickly become the “judge’s panel” where worth is measured by selfies and swipes and where satisfaction is achieved by drawing attention to your outward appearance.
If your self-confidence is founded on what others think of you, then when the right opinions don’t come through, the foundation falters. The discouragement that follows comes from the feeling that you can’t be beautiful, that you can’t change your looks and that you are trapped inside a body that nobody will appreciate.
The best way to have confidence is to build it yourself. Dating sites are not meant to give you reassurance or self-esteem. That is your job, and you can accomplish it by knowing what makes you handsome or beautiful.
“For me, a lot of it is based off of personality, because someone can be really attractive, but if they’re a jerk, then I want nothing to do with them,” Daines said.
Instead of looking for social acceptance, teens and young adults should seek for satisfaction within themselves.
When it comes to dating, most people aren’t seeking out someone to look at. Most people are looking for someone they can enjoy being with, someone that interests them. If someone has a bad personality or attitude, then they aren’t likely to maintain a good relationship, regardless of how they look.
“Personally, for me, it’s expression,” said Sam Guthrie, a freshman studying computer information technology. “The way they express themselves, you can tell if they’re a jerk or if they’re really sad and depressed or someone who’s just lively and loves people. You can usually tell just by the expression on their face.”