flirting (Christopher Pinedo)

Is it being outgoing or flirtatious?

First dates can be scary, stressful and awkward for everyone. Male students at BYU-Idaho shared their thoughts on what occurs on a first date that will determine whether or not they will ask someone on a second date and if flirtatiousness, being outgoing or being confident plays a big role in that.

“I definitely have to be able to have a fluid conversation with them and generally attracted to them in order to ask them on a second date,” said Will Perkins, a sophomore studying elementary education.

Perkins said he has to be attracted to them not just physically, but mentally and emotionally.

“I really like it when a girl can adjust to a situation,” said John Lydiksen, a sophomore studying mechanical engineering. “If the original plan doesn’t work out, I like it when a girl can be chill to do something else.”

Lydiksen said he likes girls who can make a good situation out of anything.

“Girls needs to themselves, and I understand that first dates can be awkward, but I really like it when girls can get past that and understand that we are just having fun and getting to know each other,said Thomas Whipple, a sophomore majoring in general studies. “It makes me want to ask her out again.”

Whipple said as long as a girl can be honest with herself and knows how to have a good time, that’s all he can ever ask for.

“I have taken girls out on dates who are super shy, where it’s super awkward, and I have taken girls out who are super outgoing, that it was obnoxious, and I couldn’t even say a word,” Whipple said.

Whipple said he prefers a girl to be herself as opposed to lying about who they really are. If she is shy, then she is shy; if she is outgoing, then she is outgoing, as opposed to someone lying about whom they really are.

“Whether or not the girl is shy or outgoing, I like it when a girl can keep a good conversation,” Perkins said.

Perkins said he has gone on dates with girls who are outgoing but have really shallow conversation and he has gone out on dates with girls who are really shy but have good conversation skills.

“At times, I have noticed how girls who are outgoing tend to nervous talk, and they try to just fill the silence with their words,” said Lydiksen.

Lydiksen said that when a girl is shy, it’s more difficult and uncomfortable trying to find something to talk about and that can be difficult is finding the middle ground between shy and outgoing.

“More than their personality type, their ability to converse and their ability to communicate will determine whether or not I will ask a girl out on a second date,” Perkins said.

Perkins said that confidence is also a deciding factor and whether someone is shy or outgoing, he can tell if they are confident in themselves.

“Confidence is very attractive,” Perkins said. “If someone can be confident in themselves, whether they are shy or not, it is a very important thing.”

Whipple said if a girl is really flirty, it seems as if they are very desperate.

Women with confidence don’t seek approval or need extra attention from others, according to Elite Daily.

“In a time when we are told how to be and how to act, if a girl can just do her thing, loves herself and love what she does, that is very attractive,” Whipple said.

Confident women are secure and know exactly who they are and what they are not, according to

'Is it being outgoing or flirtatious?' has 1 comment

  1. July 12, 2016 @ 5:17 pm Merritt

    I loved the idea behind this article, but I find that it was harshly one sided. I think this article would have been better if there were two female perspectives added to the two male perspectives to balance things out. Dating involves both males and females and I think in order to truly remain unbiased in this article both should have been represented. As well I think it is slightly ironic that one source said the world is constantly telling women what they should and shouldn’t be, yet that is the same feel I get from reading this article. Despite those few aspects, I really enjoyed the format the article is written in. It is different and interesting to read. I do also appreciate hearing a different perspective of dating. I know it takes a lot of work to write an article and I appreciate all the time that is put into each one, Thank you!


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