There is a true moral dilemma that can arise when it comes to physical touch in a relationship.
During the early stages of dating how does a person know when it’s right to hold their love interest’s hand, cuddle them through the movie, or place that well timed kiss?
“Every guy and every girl, they have a love language,” said Parker Robbins, a sophomore studying business analytics. “For some people, that love language is physical touch and it’s a full 10 out of 10. For other people it’s very low on the scale. So you have to be aware of that.”
Jacob Ewell, a sophomore studying nursing, said the physical is a cheaply bought commodity. You can become physical with just about anybody.
“If you’re looking for an eternal companion then you’re looking for all the other aspects besides physical,” Ewell said. “You’re looking for the spiritual, emotional and intellectual connection.”
Ian Fillerup, a sophomore studying biology, said his mission president gave him some good advice before he left the mission field to reenter the dating world. He compared the aspects of the important qualities of an eternal companion to a pyramid.
“The base should be spiritual similarities,” Fillerup said.
Fillerup said you will then have the other attributes that you want stacking on the base that you have made.
“On the very top of the pyramid, the very last block is physical touch,” Fillerup said. “If you were to flip that pyramid upside down and you had to balance the pyramid with physical touch on the bottom then it’s going to topple over just because it can’t support itself.”
Fillerup said if you are only looking to fulfill natural desires then once that is done you will find that you no longer have a anything in common.
“You’re done,” Fillerup said. “You won’t have any more need for them and you’re just sucking the life out of each other like a leech.”
When seeking to create a relationship, things take time and they need to go in their proper order.
“If you are serious about building a lasting relationship, on a solid footing of mutual respect, then the first move is clear: Go slow,” according to eHarmony.com.
Both sides of the relationship need to feel comfortable with where they are in the other aspects of the relationship before physical contact increases.
“Touch is inevitable and even desirable,” according to eHarmony.com. “When it happens lightly and spontaneously, it can provide valuable evidence of healthy respect and a commitment to honor one another’s personal boundaries and dignity — while still acknowledging the possibility of mutual attraction and future closeness.”
Respect is extremely important in building a relationship between two people that can actually last. There needs to be more commitment and less carelessness.
“You lose your sense of reasoning and do dumb things when your emotions are too high, and when you’re too physical too soon,” Robbins said “I think we need to go back to the days where a kiss was something unique and special and not so common.”